Project Bad Mutha Fucka

When I lost my Job 10 months ago I told myself I was going to make myself a bad mutha fucka to make myself strong mentally and physically and do more with my life. I have suffered from depression for years I keep it in check most of the time sometimes a flip and am not a nice person and project anger at people. Which wasn't in my nature before I was 18. Over the last few years I lost my sister who died 2 years ago on Christmas eve she had various disability's doctors said she would have died at 2 years old she didn't she lived till 23 and was the happiest person I have ever known  and no mater how bad life got for her she always had a smile on her face thats powerful to me cause here I am moaning about my life when my own situation isn't that bad. I also have two kids my oldest daughter has down syndrome which took me years to deal with. I kinda feel I got a double kick in the ball sack with my sister and daughter both having special needs. So my life isn't the same or as easy has a lot of people but also isn't has bad has how other unfortunate  people live like in the FUCKING CONGO. I started to use positive thinking more I lost my job but I thought FUCK IT I hated the fucking job anyway was a big reason why I was has depressed in the first place. Working on a dirty building site through all weathers in a dead end job with a bunch of cunts that for men like to talk about one another and back stab each other. Hanging around negative assholes ain't good for the soul.


For the past 10 months I have been training weights doing kettlebells and some mma training lost some grained weight I had put on...I also put in more time with the kids done some odd jobs and sold muscle supplements for money to keep the family going and get the kids there Xmas gifts. But all in all am not happy with my effort and results of being a bad mutha fucker. am just going to write out some things am going to amp up or try out to be the improved super human cos that's all I want to be. Am not a new year resolution person but with the distraction of Xmas out the way 1st of January is a good place to restart what I have been doing. So here's what am working on rite now.


Writing Blogs : I started this blog in august. Am shit at writing and spelling but am trying. I write about goofy things sometimes in a jokey manner or I'll do something on a subject I enjoy or I am looking into. I also am planning on doing Guinea pig blogs which I learned from author TIM FERRIES this is where I'll data crunch on experiments on my self over a number of weeks like maybe a new kettlebell/mma  workout how my how a diet is going, life changes trying new things like rock climbing or trying yoga and blogging and data crunching about it will help keep me focused on the task at hand. Plus I still want to write about goofy shit as well.


4 Hour Body : this is a book by Tim Ferries I have still to work though it all. Its about becoming the superhuman. This book is my bible right now  covers a whole range of data on the human body.Also been running it with from cool friends from twitter doing the same thing so we're helping each other with tips and giving support to one an other which is kinda cool.  Its not a book you read from start to finish in fact you only have to read the sections that apply to you such as Rapid weight loss, Muscle building, mental health, improved sleeping, Running endurance, insane strength and being better at FUCKING THE SHIT out your partner in the bedroom. All of which are tested and guinea pigged by Tim himself he cut the fat off a lot of workouts meaning less is really more workout wise. The only part I tried so far was the weight loss in two weeks I lost around 10lbs in a diet where you eat 6 times a day and one day a week you have a cheat day where you eat junk all day and you still lose weight. The science is all the book here's Tim's website for details http://www.fourhourworkweek.com/blog/ and     http://www.fourhourbody.com/ so am going to guinea pig some of this stuff myself.


Fight Training : Am a crazy combat sport fan mainly MMA which I have trained in for over 4 years apart from a Russian fist fight which I broke my hand in I haven't fought in MMA or even a grappling comp. The reason or excuse is working and family life then trying to get in fight shape as proved hard for me even now I have no job I still been having trouble working out as much as I can. Part of this is sometimes laziness like I have a new DVD boxset or video game so I GO FUCK IT AM NOT TRAINING!! is not the right approach. So the move is a have set various workout plans to work around family life like I have my eye on 3 mma gyms to bounce around on different days of the week. I enjoy Russian Combat Sambo with coach Vadim which I when to for a few months so plan on getting back to that and compete in sambo later in the year. Also Brazilian Jiu-jitsu and wrestling I had my grappling skills coming along fine at one point and slipped away it a bit.... game plan there 3 gyms with high level BJJ coaches in Wishaw, Coatbridge and Glasgow here in Scotland which I have friends in each gym to go to. Also done a few weeks with the UK commonwealth wrestling team going back there could be a big help for me. If I don't have money or am watching the kids my back up plan is to train at home or close to home. I have already been training at my Uncles garage with a little gym set up with weights and punch bags which costs me nothing or I train in my garden with my pair of 16kg Kettlebells. Striking is my main love combat wise with years of Thai boxing and boxing I still feel I have a lot of improvements here so work on this again is needed also various boxing and Thai boxing gyms to check out in my area. So I got myself a new bad boy gym bag, focus mitts I already have Fairtex Thai pads and a Gi but I would like a better Gi. Goals here to compete in grappling and sambo comps and if I get fight fit a fight in mma or Thai boxing will be on the cards but the 4 hour body diet runs hand in hand with this to get my body fat % down.


Trying New Things : Theres a shit load of stuff I want to get round to something am starting right away is Yoga. The main reason is it helps with stress gives you a better peace of mind I want to know if the ZEN state is real am telling you those ancient Asian dudes were on to something. I have been getting a lot of on off headaches and lower back pain and a lot of flexibly I had is gone. Am hoping this balances me out a bit more and is the YING to weight lifting or smashing Thai pads YANG. I ordered Rodney Yee's Power Yoga heard he's one of the best. http://www.yeeyoga.com/ THERES HIS WEBPAGE IF YOU WANT TO CHECK THAT OUT. Also for the same reasons I going to try out the Isolation Tank soon http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Isolation_tank. And down the line some outdoor extreme sports I would like to check out maybe rock climbing or snowboarding


Nutrition: with my training you need to feed your body the right stuff the 4 hour body has taught me more about Nutrition which before I ate like shit and then trained at times I would get pretty fit but I would look the same body wise because my nutrition wasn't good. So along with my 4 hour body diet I'll try different supplements and record the results like protein from muscle phram  http://musclepharm.com/ am also for the first time trying out some mental Nutrition along with trying Yoga am trying out Alpha Brian http://www.onnit.com/alphabrain/ should be here soon from this you get  lucid dreams, mental drive, focus, memory, and mental acuity. to name some of the benefits. And 5HTP which I have heard good things about. So I'll data crunch about all these things and hope for good results from the mma ,weights, yoga and Nutrition and be as honest as I can with the results I get.


Enjoying Life : this is the main thing sometimes family life is stressful and can distract you from your personal goals. But without taking away time trying to be a good dad. This year  I would like to go to Holland and Train at one of the world famous kickboxing camps for maybe a week or two, also my game plan is to check out more stand up comedy which am becoming a massive fan of this year I saw and met Steve O,Tom Green and Bill Burr. This I already have a ticket for the crusher Doug Stanhope and hope to get tickets for Joe Rogan, Jim Jefferies, Bill Burr again and The Machine Bert Kreischer. I have always watched live music the last while not so much last one was the Arctic Monkeys. Next Year the Black Keys to start the year and T in the Park I hope with the return of The Stones Roses one of my favourite bands ever. I also like to smoke the good stuff now and will be getting into that more aswell. Attend a UFC event again would be cool.


My main Focus is not to sit around to much and watch TV and play video games am looking into different career paths as well like short college courses to learn new things. Was thinking Photography or cinematography or something along the lines of sports and nutrition and kettlebell courses. Sitting around is fun too but I maybe do to much so Project Bad Mutha Fucka is the name of my plan. What is a Bad Mutha Fucka well I don't know its just a silly name. But My goal is to be as much of a superhuman as I can be to be cool to people and encourage positive thinking because we're only here for a short time. No point worrying about past fuck ups shine a positive light on things don't worry about martial bull shit spend your time and money on experiences weather its something you already love or new shit better than having nothing but a bunch of shiny shit to show for your life. Really this blog is just for me to kick myself in the right path, So enjoy 2012 It could be the last one if the Mayans where right. as always @shogunskilling on twitter if your a savage and want to shoot the shit


DEATHSQUAD ALL DAY
THE SHOGUN

UFC 140....AFTERMATH

Okay so I done my picks post how for my aftermath where I went right and wrong and whats next with the fighters of UFC 140


Mark Hominick (20-9-0 ) vs. Chan Sung Jung (11-3-0) ...I had Mark taking this by better boxing and if you seen the event I was off by a long mile. They touch gloves Mark throws a crazy looping left hook Jung steps out of reach steps back in with a perfect  right cross floors Hominick and finishes with a flurry of ground and pound in 7 SECONDS!!! of the first round WINNER Chan Sung Jung..... Whats next after two great wins in the UFC Chan should jump right in there again with the winner of Diego Nunes vs Manny Gamburyan at ufc 141 or Tyson Griffen could be a good move since Jose Aldo is running out of toys to play with.


Antonio Rogerio Nogueira (19-5) vs. Tito Ortiz (16-9-1) This one I had Lil Nog on points. The fight started Ortiz came in guns blazing done well the first part of the round then Lil nog got his higher level boxing going caught Tito with a flurry had him in trouble dropped him with a beautiful knee Ortiz hit the mat and Lil Nog ground and pounded away with hard shots to the body till the ref stopped the fight. Good effort by Tito maybe his last fight I would like to see one more the guy does bring IT maybe against Forrest Griffen for a third time or Rich Franklin would make sense. As for Lil Nog theres only one guy that makes sense to me a rematch with Shogun Rua there first fight was a classic at the pride LHW 2005 gp which shogun won a close fight old skool fans would find this mouthwatering. These ain't wrestlers so your going to get good stand up and maybe good bbj showing for the fans GET IT DONE JOE SILVA 

FRANK MIR VS BIG NOG...OHH DON'T LOOK SNAP!!!

 Frank Mir (15-5) vs. Antonio Rodrigo Nogueira 2 (33-6-1) the talking point of the night in this crazy one round war. I like Mir but I love big Nog. I picked Mir 2nd round tko here I fought Mir had improved more. The round starts Nog gets right in there they box a bit a Little cage control battle Mir gets a takedown Nog battles back up then picks Mir apart with sharp boxing sending him to the floor Nog ground and pounds a little Mir looks out (Now if Nog stayed here and fired in some rapid punches I beileve the Ref would have stopped it my heart was going at this point thinking NOG had it) But Nog slips under for a  guillotine choke doesn't get it Mir recovers grabs a Kimura Nog rolls Mir but Nog didn't steady the position so Mir rolled him again cranks the hold and what happen next was both spectacular and horrible He breaks Big Nog's Arm Nog taps as it breaks fight over HOLY SHEEP DIP it was crazy!!! what I said in my picks blog I want to see some boxing then some BJJ from the two best heavyweight BJJ artists in the game. I thought Nog looked good up till the snap word is hes out for 9 months if he comes back I don't know whats next maybe thats it for him hes had a long career of wars but if he comes back maybe a guy like Roy Nelson could be a good move. As for Frank Mir he stays on hold for maybe stepping in for Overeem vs Lesnar then VS champ Dos Stanos incase one gets injured. Or a fight with former champ Cain Velasquez if hes ready to go.

Jones walks away after brutal choke out of lyoto

  Champ Jon Jones vs. Lyoto Machida....The title fight I had Jones winning in the 3 round The FIRST round Machida controled Jones with sharper strikeing good in out movements Jones seem a little lost trying to get Lyoto . Lyoto landed some soild kicks and punches and even had Jones on the back foot. Round 2 was still Lyoto to begin with then Jones gets it to the floor lands a big elbow cuts Lyoto open he gets back to his feet the ref stops the check the cut. They fight again Jones lands a big punches drops Lyoto. Machida gets back up but hes still out of there Jones kind of standing guillotined him I think it was an old catch wrestling move chokes Lyoto standing till hes not moving The ref steps in Jones drops Lyoto to the ground out cold which I fought was very unclassy he must have felt Lyoto going out just to drop him and walk away but maybe it was just the heat of the moment. Anyway Jon Jones wins in brutal fashion again I put him at No2 pound for pound now because of the big names he has crushed and stopped the such a short time. He may be No 1 but Anderson Silva has been on a roll from 2005/6 so hes still Number 1 at the moment. Next for him the winner of Rashad Evans vs Phil Davies or Dan Henderson may be in the mix also. As for Lyoto the loser of Rashad Evans vs Phil Davies and again if Hendo doesn't get a title shot Machida vs Henderson would be fun. IF YOU WANT TO TALK MMA FOLLOW ME ON TWITTER @SHOGUNSKILLING


AWESOME EVENT AGAIN
THE SHOGUN

UFC 140: Jones vs. Machida....PICKS

Okay am a fanatical fight fan so I decided to give the world my fight picks and aftermath of chosen events I know what all you guys really need to know what a 5,8 slightly overweight pasty Scottish guy thinks about this stuff so lets crack on first one.


UFC 140 from  Toronto, Ontario, Canada


Mark Hominick (20-9-0 ) vs. Chan Sung Jung (11-3-0) ....Good chance this is fight of the night two good guys Jung (the Korean Zombie) star of the epic WEC fight with Leonard Garcia straight from a rocky movie Jung lost on points but I feel he got robbed in that fight, So they rematched in the UFC and Jung won Via (the first ever twister in the ufc in round 2) Jung looked really good and made some big improvements. Hominick coming off his title losing effort against Jose Aldo jr was an epic battle and I became a fan due to this fight. He went into the fight an underdog against the almost untouchable Aldo got dropped a few times had some great exchanges him self and suffered a giant Hematoma to bounce back in the final round to dominate  the champ. He lost the fight but showed crazy heart and got himself a ton of new fans....I think Mark Hominick Takes this on points his boxing is crisper than Jung's and he done fine on the ground with the Champ Aldo a think Mark will be confidant after the war with the champ also a factor will be the death of this coach and close friend Shawn Tompkins could drive Mark to a big Win infront of his home crowd...Mark Hominick unanimous decision




Antonio Rogerio Nogueira (19-5) vs. Tito Ortiz (16-9-1) Am looking forward to this one Tito has looked good this year after a few dodgy years finally getting a win against Ryan Bader and a good showing for his 2 weeks notice fight against Rashad Evans even thou he lose lost he fought hard in a fun fight. Lil Nog needs a win too his weakness is the wrestling which Tito has but his Bjj is good and his boxing is excellent he lost to Bader and Davies because of wrestling but his takedown defence was good the first half of the Davies fight I think a little more improvement there Tito doesn't get it to the ground then we'll see a boxing match Tito training with BJ Penn's boxing coach  could help but I think Nogueira gets it done maybe tko but Tito's is hard to finish so I'll go with points again. should be a great fight for the old skool fans Nog from Pride and Tito Early UFC.....Antonio Rogerio Nogueira unanimous decision

Frank Mir (15-5) vs. Antonio Rodrigo Nogueira 2 (33-6-1)  The rematch to the 2008 fight which Mir won easy via tko in round 2 both guys have won and lose after this Mir winning this last 2 showing more improved in the stand up. Big Nog won his last fight by KO after a long lay off. Am a big Nogueira fan I hope he wins the old pride fights where he takes a beating and comes back to win are classics and I was jumping about crazy when he came back from injuries to KO Brendan Schab. But I have Frank Mir by the same result as last time TKO 2nd round I think Mir as improved more in three years hes 20 pounds heavier and moves better in the stand up using angles and crisp combos but Nog has proved us wrong before I would like to see these guys box a bit then see who has the better BJJ this time but anyway...Frank Mir TKO ROUND 2

 Champ Jon Jones vs. Lyoto Machida (for light-heavyweight title) The Main event the former champ Machida gets his shot due to Evans not being Healthy but all these top 10 guys make for main event worthy fights Lyoto like Jones was the unstoppable force just a few years ago untouchable until he fought Shogun he won but nearly everyone said Shogun won so they rematched and Shogun destroyed Lyoto in the first round. Then he lost a close fight to Rampage Jackson after that he came back beating my hero Randy Couture with a crazy crane kick right out of the karate kid. Randy was 48 but Lyoto looked good with footwork and keeping Couture at range But hes fighting Jon Jones the champ on his forth fight this year no one as even came close with this guy yet beating Bader by sub Shogun by beatdown and Jackson by sub all big name guys hes shaping up right now that hes going to be a giant superstar. Both these guys throw crazy kicks, knees ,elbows and trips and good ground game. Can Lyoto win YES at this level anyone can win with those little gloves but will he win I can't see it Lyoto has slick stand up but so does Jones and hes bigger stronger faster his reach is unreal his throws are unreal he gets knock outS and subs he does it all. I hope for a back and forward fight maybe Jones may show some cracks in his game with this being his forth fight this year. I see it a slow start then Jones picking him apart for a tko round 3 its to hard to pick against the guy right now but we'll see.....Jon Jones Tko round 3 

ARE YOU KIDDING ME

THE SHOGUN

I Pity the Fool That Painted My Face

As I get older am forgetting large parts of my life mostly my heavy party days of 14 to 18 I lost a lot of weekends and blogs posts to these blacked out moments. But remember some things like it was yesterday right back to 4 year old like my  4th birthday party I got this sweet Knight Rider push car it was awesome in November 88. To my dislike a friend of mine was playing in it I told him to get out KITT but he wouldn't so what did I do. I pushed him down the stairs of my mum and dad's flat at the time while he was still inside the push car. He tumbled down crashing to the bottom, you can't do that shit as an adult but as a kid I think I maybe didn't get to eat my birthday cake big deal!!! also Kitt survived the crash. Another memory is my friend @weerambo and his big stupid jacket and 80's mullet haircut  and that one day playing in the moors his boot stuck into the mud never to be found again why is that a big memory for me I don't know.


Also one time out playing I fell down and cut my ball-bag THAT I REMEMBER VERY WELL...OHHH THE BLOOD. One thing I remember that pissed me off all my life is when at a party at the nursery still at 4 it was a fun day of sorts there was a lady doing face paint. Now wait till you read what this CUNT done and I hope she got 1980's aids the strongest aids ever known because of it. I think in 1988 at 4 my favourite TV shows were Knight Rider, The Hulk I liked  Thundercats , He-man (side note...one thing about the he-man cartoon looking back it was gay as fuck I loved it as a kid but it was dumb as fuck I mean when Adam the prince turned into He-man he when from this Brock Lesner build guy with blonde hair and then with POWER OF GREYSKULL he turned into the same person apart from at some point during the power of grey skull bit he died his hair ginger and got a spray tan somewhere on the planet  Eternia and found a outfit worthy of any gay pride festival and no one knew the different just saying it was stupid) and I also loved the A-TEAM.

SEE WHERE DO YOU GET A SPARY TAN IN ETERNIA

So I asked the lady if she could paint my face like MR T she said yes and painted my face. After this was done in my 4 year old head I had just been transformed from a pasty white kid with a bowl cut to a giant muscle bound black guy with a Mohawk. I running around acting tough fighting with other kids shout I PITY THE FOOL AND I AIN'T GETTIN ON NO PLANE!!!! When I needed to take a piss and then I saw my face in the bathroom mirrior was I MR T the giant muscle bound black man with a Mohawk? NO!!! I WASN'T the fucking bitch painted my face as a CAT!!!!! A FUCKING CAT. What person tells a small kid hes Mr T and the whole time hes a cat the other parents must they thought I have mental problems running around thinking am a black guy when am just a big FAGGOTING CAT. Anyway rant over


FUCK YOU  FACE PAINTING BITCH
THE SHOGUN   

Kids Dance Shows

Being a dad of two daughters and I love my daughters but it's the law or something to attend anything they do like parents night, kids birthday parties and worst of all FUCKING DANCE SHOWS ...I am a asshole this is true and I do enjoy watching my kids who are 8 and 5 do there dance 5/6 routines there in my problem is watching the other 23 routines there not in with everyone else's fuckin kids I don't care about like I said am an asshole. I don't like dance I don't like to dance because I can't I hate plays and also musicals WHY???? you ask....BECAUSE I HAVE HAIR ON MY FUCKING BALLS, I LIKE FIGHT SPORTS, SHOOTING PEOPLE ON THE OTHER SIDE OF THE WORLD ON XBOX AND WATCHING ANIMAL AND SLAP FIGHTS ON UTUBE that's why the other stuff is boring as fuck too me plus I think I have some mild A.D.D. I mean dancing to me like in a night club is like some primal shit before sex you are grinding and stuff I mean really the result you want is your dick sliding in and out of something whether it be a wet VAG or a shit filled dirt box whatever your into People I think that's what dancing is for right? some animals do dances hoping to mate afterwards. So watching kids do J-LO and BRITTANY dance routines CREEPS me out a little.

But fuck it I just keep my mouth shut and do what am told by the girlfriend and go. This was my third dance show this year you think these things would last an hour but NO!!!! try 3 AND A FUCKING HALF HOURS this was a street dance show so I thought maybe we'll get some cool break dance moves. Now the music at these shows is straight up shit there's no Black Keys or Led Zeppelin just Black eye Peas and LMFAO Shuffling horse shit. My kids were in the first few dances very good fun watching them on stage I wouldn't have the bottle to do that. The next dance the kids of 7 at the most they were wearing masks right out the movie EYES WIDE SHUT....WTF?   Next the boys group comes out don't people sent boys to Karate or a Real Sport any more I see why there's not many at the scouts now those dirty scoutmasters...side note I was a scout for a bit and I don't think I got made to blow anyone unless its a memory so painful I don't remember now so am pretty sure in my 26 years I haven't had a finger in my asshole once NOT EVEN MY GIRLFRIEND I don't like that road trip did I say 2 make that 3 shitttttttttttttttttttt!!!!!!. But lets get back on track. Being from Scotland the % of black people isn't has high as other country's and I don't blame them its rains all the time here. So out of the 12 eight year old kids I was so happy there was a black child and if american street, basketball and gangs movies have taught me is that black people can dance, jump high and bust a freestyle rap on cue. Great lets see what this kids got....result nothing he was shit no dance skills at all WHY!! american movies WHY!!! did you lie to me. Turns out this pasty ginger kid was the best he was doing the worm and turn head spin in shit he was awesome I got to say.

The first act was set up like spring summer winter that stuff then a break and just to point out I hate small talk Like OHHH WHAT'S THE WHETHER LIKE and standing with like 200 people from your home town people I don't really know much about or have everything in common with small talk is the only talk that gets you through it I can't stand it. Act 2 I think was another 18 fucking songs from movies and fucking musicals FUCCCCCKKKKKKKKKKKKK!!!!!! FUCK MY FACE THERE IS NO GOD!!!!! One of my life goals was to get through my life without hearing or seeing anything from the Musical CATS!!!! and you guessed it they done cats. Now I know why some people just flip and start shooting handguns in crowded areas really kids dresses like cats pretending to be cats over a soundtrack of ear H.I.V. Why didn't just not put 10 real cats 5 mice and 3 pitbulls on stage think of the fun that would be I'd pay like £50 for that. So at the end of a long show all the kids came out to in bow to the cheering crowd and this little kid gets so amped up he just vomits all over the stage awesome that was the highlight for me. So just to say there's nothing wrong with dance shows like I said am an asshole and inpatient to that stuff. Surely thats makes me a good dad the fact I sit through something I deeply hate to support my kids let me know @shogunskilling in twitter

CATS IS GAY
THE SHOGUN 

The Male Finish

This blog is about the funny world of a man obsession of shooting loads on things. Sperm is meant to go in the vagina and then some technical stuff happens and babies come out and cry then you spend your life raising the baby till it grows old enough to shoot or take loads itself and the circle of life goes on I think that is what the loin king was trying to say.  But anyway there's some things that am guilty of and some friends are and am going to say every male is unless there weird. I mean man likes to shoot loads in pussies and watch it drip out fire on backs, tits, faces and the ass also weirder ones feet maybe an ear hole the possibilities are endless.

The thing I find funny is whats going through the girls mind with our craziness and I tip my my hat off to you ladies for putting up with our bullshit am sure some of you love a blob of potato juice right in the eyeball and am sure some just put up with it to keep there men happy and use are all angles and are all getting a pass through the golden gates of heaven and a purple heart for taking multiple shots in battle. But I want to know and feel free to write back @shogunskilling on twitter....Whats going through your heads when your just lying there and the man's titty fucking you  your looking up at the madness in his  chimp with rabies face I mean a dick between the tits does nothing for you. From my own account I have been titty fucking my girl she's looking at me am thrusting between her big cans like a madman am not giving a fuck no ones stopping me from shooting this load still thrusting thrusting powerful thrusting........ And AAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!! FUCKING YESSSSSSSSSSSS ALL OVER THE NIPPLES and then a MASSIVE sense of stupidest goes through my head am still sitting on top of her shes got jizz all over her and our like "ehhhhhhhh do you want me to get a towel" and you clean it off and sit weird of a few minutes What is going on in a woman's mind witnessing that .

A story from a friend of mine I though was funny was he was dating this girl and the night of the first time they had sex he undressed her and she had a tramp stamp of a dog on her lower back. He asked whats with the dog and she told the story of how it was her childhood pet it was one of they bloodhound dogs like droopy with the big floppy ears and it died and she loved it so much she tattooed it on her lower back so she would never forgot the love she felt for that faithful animal...end of the story HE FUCKED HER DOGGY STYLE AND FINISHED ALL OVER THE TAT OF THE DROOPY DOG SHE LOVED SO MUCH...why I don't know but I would have done it to because thats what guys do and its a funny story to tell your friends. Its like porn videos and porn sites you switch it on to find a hot chick with glasses on and right away you know the endding to the porn flick the guys going to NUT ALL OVER THE LENSES OF TRENDY OFFICE SPECKS so she can't see through them again WHY? I don't know but I would do that aswell it must be a primal thing of marking of territory of something a don't know  its a mystery. I mean your girl over 10 plus years you have lovely children with her and you tell her all your feeling and secrets BUT still in the heat of the moment you just want to grab that throat cum up her nose on her eyeballs so she can't open her eyelids and then get a towel for her and sit weird after climax because of your freaky manliness you can't help...So I salute the woman of the world you put up with so much

I would like to thank     http://www.skanktees.com for letting me guest on his website and buy a Tshirt follow me on twitter @shogunskilling and read more from me at http://derekskilling84.blogspot.com/ and follow @skanktees and join in on some deathsquad famliy chat on twitter also all Bad mutha fuckers on there

ALWAYS SHOOTING SALTY LOADS
SHOGUN SKILLING

Buckfast, Weed and UFC 135

On the 24th of September a few hours before UFC 135 I was busy fucking about with a garden shed with no money. Normally on fight nights a get a load of buddies round and we get fucked up and watch my number one passion in life for the last four years MMA/UFC. We have had some crazy nights of madness and kept my street awake with all the noise coming for my house. So the fight was Rampage Jackson former champ and veteran of the sport and star of the A-TEAM movie if anyone doesn't know who he is Versus Jon Bones Jones the young 24 year old Phenom that has been destroying everyone in his path. With two black guys and like most black guys from America they can jive talk at the highest of levels so a lot was on this fight and I was amped as fuck to watch it. But at 7.00pm am still fucking about outside I have no money and no time to to sort a good night with friends. So I was just going to watch on my own like a Benny no mates!!!

When my good friend Ryan Hamilton @weerambo on twitter called and was having a night off blowing the back end off crazy hookers he fucks weekly. To buy me drink and A lovely bag of green!!! LETS GET THIS PARTY STARTED!!! Also my girlfriend and two daughters were still up and I don't like getting fucked up in front of my kids so waited till they were in bed. Ryan had brought in a bottle of the finest wine in all of the land BUCKFAST TONIC WINE (GODS WINE) this was the drink of choice for young 14 year old's in central Scotland cause its cheap its 15% and it gets you fuck up. I have drank this since my 14th birthday not so much now but I still like it now and again. It has legendary status in Scotland for the cause of a fuck load of crime and chaos in my home country no shit just google it. I myself have been arrested Twice on this mighty wine that everyone hates the taste of but still drinks it anyway so much so that there's fridges with only buckfast and maybe like 2 cartons of milk in it in the shops here...nicknames are (A BOTTLE OF VIOLENCE, A BOTTLE OF WHAT THE FUCK ARE YOU LOOKING AT!!!! AND A BOTTLE OF WREAK THE HOOSE JUICE) And its made in England where no one drinks it AND!!! its made by MONKS FUCKING MONKS made it, people have been stabbed to death because for this drink and god's Monks are down in England crushing grapes with there bare feet FUCKED UP HUH? He also at the case of Fosters an Australian beer that no one in Australia drinks cause it tastes like shit!!! But am Scottish and would drink anything if its cheap and gets you fucked up.

As the night when on we watched Louis Ck stand up show and laughed our asses off and blasted some top tunes from Oasis , the Black Keys and the drunker we got the more old skool hip hop we were singing songs from the late Nate Dogg in our best black guy soul voices and for white Scottish lads we done a good job. Ryan starts blazing the pipe up right in my living room and the kids are sleeping upstairs am like FUCK THE MISSUS WILL KILL ME YOU CUNT!!! GIVE ME SOME and got high as giraffe pussy to the point where we decided who can do the best hand stand

who has the best handstand Ryan above or me below right 

Once the ufc came on it was a good event fights with Nate Diaz showed his best boxing and submissions skills to date against Takanori Gomi and UFC Hall of Famer Matt Hughes vs Josh Koscheck the fight lasted one round by I was so high I thought the fight when 10 rounds and it only goes to 3 round, Koscheck knocked the legend Matt Hughes out and a good chance will be his final fight. The main event Jon Jones vs Rampage...Jones showed why hes the big talking point in mma at the moment with a great showing of skill making Rampage look like he didn't have a chance evading his big punches and landing tons of kicks and elbows one which cut him open and submitted Jackson via choke in the 4th round and after all the jive talking a great show of respect and a kind of passing of the torch moment for the fans.

With fight finished and a good night of stand up comedy, good tunes, getting fucked up and watching the ancient art of face punching it was time for bed, And its good to have buddies when you have no cash to and not at a drink in weeks to bring you weed wine and beer. It wasn't the craziest night but it was a fun night and ufc 136 is soon so.....

Buckle Up Bitches
The Shogun

Floyd Mayweather VS Vitor Ortiz..My Breakdown

Am a MMA Guy a fanatic if you will as for boxing well I still like it but its lost it's edge and I hope it come's back But after Floyd Mayweather and Manny Pacquiao retire I think the sports as good as dead well high profile dream fights will be, But I hope not!!!! I grew up a Mike Tyson fan and at one time was a fanatic about boxing too, watching  the old glory days of the 70's when everyone fought everyone over a 100 years of glorious history in boxing I really do hope it comes back strong.

So am not the biggest Mayweather fan but you can't help find the guy interesting and without a doubt one of the best and most technical prize fighters ever!!!!  So I watched the build up HBO'S 24/7 a four part and a great watch Floyd's this larger than life guy with crazy money massive ego to match tons of famous fan's like 50 cent come around to his gym watch him train along with a giant entourage of people he really is a superstar of modern boxing. The build was great I never heard of Vitor Ortiz till I watched it the guy was from a tough childhood with both parents walking out on him so they build him has this guy who came from nothing and trying to reach the top of the mountain...best scene of the bulid up was Floyd jr and Floyd sr his dad almost come to blows at the Mayweather gym. Its a weird set up his dad messed up when Floyd was young I don't know the history and Floyd get's trained by his uncle Roger now also Floyd Sr trained other fighters against Floyd Jr which is crazy to me. But the fight between them was nuts and a little sad it just looked like his dad wanted to be a bigger part of the team and Floyd Jr wasn't having any of it.SEE THE FIGHT ABOVE!!!



So I watched the fight starting with the Awesome Micheal Buffer with his LETS GET READY TO RUMBLE!!!!!!!! the first three rounds were more or less all Floyd, with great footwork and counter striking. Round 4 the Floyd still in control Oritz then comes in with a nice flurry of punches and then Headbutt's Mayweather the ref stops the action. Oritz says sorry to Floyd they meet in the middle of the ring and Oritz says sorry again a second or two after Mayweather lands a left hook followed by a straight right when Ortiz's hands were still down the ref counts Ortiz out and the fights over Mayweather wins another title and remains undefended. It was a crazy ending to such a high profile fight, but who's at fault?

the headbutt

VITOR ORTIZ : Now all this started with Vitor's headbutt he did say sorry right after and right before he got knocked out. But in the rules there's a rule PROTECT YOURSELF AT ALL TIMES before he got knocked out his hands were down and Mayweather is known to fight dirty.

FLOYD MAYWEATHER : Floyd did sucker punch Ortiz just after he said sorry and he did have his hands down. The ref didn't tell them to fight and he finished the fight. But from Floyd's point of view who have trained 12 weeks everyday at boxing your winning the fight and next you get headbutted and your lip is burst open. Vitor Ortiz said he didn't mean to do that but if you watch the video he's punching Floyd stops for a second and drives his head into Mayweather's jaw. So I can see in the heat of the moment why Floyd done that and like I  said PROTECT YOURSELF AT ALL TIMES so tough titty Vitor!!!!

JOE CORTEZ : The referee Joe stopped the action after the headbutt when the two when two the middle joe didn't even tell them to fight and wasn't even looking when Mayweather knocked him out. When Ortiz hit the floor Joe counted him out.....In my view its all this guys fault he did take a point away for the headbutt but its the refs job to control the action he's in charge of the fight and the fighters well being during the 12 round affair. He done his job wrong and in a high profile fight like this he should be sacked just my view

The best bit of the fight was the post interview with massive boo's pointed at Mayweather When HBO's Larry Merchant tried to interview Mayweather after the fight, Mayweather suggested the 80-year-old boxing analyst talk to Ortiz "since you've never given me a fair shake." Mayweather then said to Larry you don't know shit about boxing HBO should fire you, to which Merchant replied, "If I was 50 years younger, I'd kick your ass!!!!!" This was funny as hell to me a 34 year old black man shouting at a 80 year old white guy who can barely talk really I don't how he holds his job guess he's just been there forever. And he says he would woop him if he was 50 years younger to massive cheers from the crowd.


I think this sucker punch win will go down as one of the most conversational ending in boxing  history along with the ALI PHANTOM PUNCH AGAINST LISTON AND MIKE TYSON CHEWING OFF A BIT OF HOLYFIELD'S EAR!!!!


After this Floyd Mayweather has enhanced his villainous image setting up the biggest fight ever against  Manny Pacquiao...Think about the world already wanted to see it it's the only fight that matches those glory days of boxing. The villan with the money burning ego vs the humble man who gives most of his money to his home country of the philippines. It would be ppv gold But will it ever happen I hope so it has to. If these guys were MMA fighters they would have already fought like 3 times by now cause in mma the fighter want to fight the best, But boxing there's all the money and corruption I think Manny would fight Floyd in a heartbeat but Floyd's stalling for whatever reason. You can't call yourself the best when there another guy right there beating all the top guys next to you and you haven't fought DO IT FOR THE FANS AND YOUR DIEING SPORT PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE!!!!!!!!!!! 

Heres the full thing above the headbutt, sucker punch and post fight interview




FLOYD MAYWEATHER VS MANNY PACQUIAO 2012 FINGERS CROSSED




HANDS OF STEEL
THE SHOGUN

Denver FUCKING Airport?

Like most people who fuck around online I love a good conspiracy JFK,MOONLANDINGS,AREA 51 THE 9/11 stuff. But I was watching Jessie Ventura's conspiracy show now his shows dog shit Him and his team go around asking questions about conspiracy's but its all set up so fake and acted out the show seems really goofy. This show was about secret underground bunkers some points goofy some  interesting till he got to Denver Airport and I was blown away!!! for reals.


Now theory's on 2012 with solar flares or planet x (Nibiru)  the crash of civilzation, the new world order and the end of the world can step aside for a moment till I shed some facts about this airport.

Some interesting facts: these are from another website

• Even though the area is basically flat (with a stunning view of mountains all around, since it's in a valley), the expense and time was taken to extensively lower some areas and raise others. They moved 110 million cubic yards of earth around. This is about 1/3rd of the amount of earth they moved when they dug out the Panama Canal.
• The airport has a fiber optic communications core made of 5,300 miles of cable. That's longer than the Nile River. That's from New York City to Buenos Aires, Argentina. The airport also has 11,365 miles of copper cable communications network.
• The fueling system can pump 1,000 gallons of jet fuel per minute through a 28-mile network of pipes. There are six fuel hold tanks that each hold 2.73 million gallons of jet fuel. This is somewhere in the "no one will ever ever need this much" range.
• Granite was imported from all over the world - Asia, Africa, Europe, North and South America - and used in making the main terminal floor. This is a ridiculous expense, especially when you're already over budget. They say, "The floor pattern echoes the roof design and subtly reinforces passenger flows". Ah...subliminal messages to move your ass. It might look pretty but would any of us know Chilean granite from Chinese granite? Or care? You can dye rock if it's colors you're after. Cheaper rocks. (I wonder what the "stones have power" people say about this...)
• The huge, main terminal is Jeppesen Terminal, named after Elfrey Jeppesen, who was the first person to create maps specifically for aviation (the company is still in business today). This area is known as the "Great Hall"; it's said this is what the Masons name their meeting place.
  It is 900 feet by 210 feet big. This is over 1.5 million square feet of space. All told, there is over 6 million square feet of public space at DIA. The airport brags that they have room to build another terminal and two more concourses and could serve 100 million passengers a year. The airport flew 36 million in 2001.
• The only way to get to the other two concourses/terminals from the Great Hall, or vice versa, is via the airport's train system.
• There are more than 19 miles (30 km) of conveyor belt track, luggage transport cars and road in their own underground tunnels that move baggage and goods. They're so huge you can drive trucks through them, and some remain unused. 
• DIA is the only airport in the world that is located so far from the urban center it services, distanced at more than 20 miles east of the city of Denver.
• It was originally budgeted at 1.7 billion dollars to build, and ended up costing almost 5 billion.
• Queen Elizabeth and several other top world diplomats have reportedly purchased land near the airport.

• OK that was some stats now lets get weird  remember this is a fucking airport!!!!!! 

Above is some New World Order shit!! notice the masonic badge RIGHT THERE IN THE FUCKING MIDDLE and just under it says NEW WORLD AIRPORT COMMISSION and if you look that up it DOESN'T EXIST!!!!! THAT'S FREAKY

  

Next nothing crazy it's just a GARGOYLE COMING OUT A BRIEFCASE I have one in my living room

The Horse – Nicknamed “Bluecifer” by the locals due to its ominious appearance, a sculpture of a giant blue Mustang stands guard at the entrance/exit of the terminal.
With blazing red eyes, the horse rears back in a terrifying display that almost feels like a warning to all who enter. Many harken it to one of the four horses of the Apocalypse.
Most frightening of all is the true story about how part of this sculpture fell and killed the artist, Luis Jiménez, while he was working on it. 




There also Murals of the end of the world with an evil figure holding a sword and a AK 47 stabbing the dove of peace with dead people from different races now this might be some modern art I don't know but really like I said ITS A FUCKING AIRPORT...also rumours of a city sized underground facility still being worked on and 20'000 troops stationed near by. Plus more marking and hidden signs throughout the airport. THE QUESTIONS ARE is it just bullshit or is the NWO really at work there and planning to save the chosen few from 2012 like disaster. Make your own mind up but the way world event's are unfolding this really scare's the shit out of me. WATCH VIDEO BELOW FOR MORE INFO THE CHICK HAS A FUNNY VOICE WHICH CREEPS ME OUT MORE THAN THE AIRPORT AND SOME POINTS ARE DUMB BUT SOME ARE GOOD AND SCARY

http://conspiracies.skepticproject.com/articles/nwo/denver-international-airport/

ABOVE IS A LINK THAT DEBUNKS THE  CONSPIRACY

2012 I'LL BE AT DENVER AIRPORT WITH A SHOGUN SAYING LET ME IN!!!!!!!!!!


THE SHOGUN

MANSHIT LEVELS part 1

This post is about MANSHIT LEVELS in this modern world with ipods, laptops, big screen TVs, all the info need just by GOGGLING THAT SHIT SUN!!!! If  you want something to eat you just call a takeaway or get up off your ass go to the supermarket and buy the ready killed and wrapped (animals) food and its fucking awesome!!!! but I really do think by shit being so easy (OH yeah if your from a third world country ,a war torn village, live in the jungle or Chuck Norris don't read this i sound like an asshole  but if you have Internet access what the fuck you moaning about your doing fine read on!!!) yeah so shits easy now am not saying easy as in life's easy am easy as in........ You don't have get up at 5 am stab a cow in the face skin it for clothes and eat the dumb fuckin thing!!!! So we're on the level now

So for me I had a boring fucking job I painted on BUILDING SITES (MANSHIT POINTS) But I really fucking hated it. I had the same shit everyday paint go home deal with the kids and listen to the girlfriend maybe watch a movie and repeat the next day....living that way fucks with a man.... You grow up with dreams wanting to do stuff see the world I had kids in my young party phase and wasn't mentally ready for it. I could have went to a doctor and got pills to help with my depression you sit back watching your mates go on wild holiday's and your stuck bringing up a couple of rug rats at 17. So I started Muay Thai kickboxing and then MMA and other combat sports and started feeling much better. And it really comes down to this I spend my childhood out smashing shit building camps ,fishing , shooting air rifles, playing in the woods you know boys stuff. I think am part of the last generation of kids that went out to play am only 26 but kids at 10 now sit on facebook and xbox all the time I never see kids just running around with a stick useing it as a machine gun anymore..I love fucking about online and playing xbox watching movies/TV shows too. But go outside and do shit you'll feel much better.

My point is Manshit do stuff that your body is meant to do to kick into your natural reward system and props to JOE ROGAN for making me think this way. Yes enjoy fucking about online but work on your skill sets you get one shot at life no point sitting around pissed off all the time and yes a do still sit about pissed off at times but you just work on improving yourself.

THE LOWEST FORM OF MANSHIT LEVELS EVER SEEN

My MANSHIT LEVELS from 1 to 10... 1 the weakest 10 the highest

1. Justin Bieber and the Faggot Vampire dude from Twilight very low levels here and whats wrong with men today  there tests counts are so low they mite have vagina's 
2. Lady GAGA also another person that is what is wrong with the world today but she still as higher test levels than Bieber and Rpatz
3. BIG FRUITY CAMP DUDES
4. THE DUDES FROM JERSEY SHORE yes very high tests levels in good shape but you lose levels for being thick as pig shit you need the metal edge as well
5. People that are working hard looking after there family but they just don't get the foot down enough to get out and work on that manshit you guys are doing well stick in the under 5's can go fuck themselves
6. People that have got 5 down and have a cool hobby like mma, rock climbing, deep sea diving group hug guys use are doing a great job
7. Now were at the Alpha level
8. this list doesn't make sense 
9. Bear Grills, Clint Eastwood and Hulk Hogan
10. Joe Rogan, Randy Couture, Bruce Lee, WAR Hero's, Inventor's and Russians

Ok my list sucked a bag of dicks am not researching am just shooting off the top of my head am dumb I am working on it.

So if your a 7 your solid you don't to do much more but if you are a 7 you'll notice some key alpha behaviour 

at hq with my green tea

•  Taking Massive Shits is awesome it feels good you get some good reading time in.
• Shooting loads Daily is a must or rape chokes will be used and then jail
• You can't do small talk it doesn't interest you 
• opening a can/tin with a knife when theres a can/tin opener handy excites you so does fashioning a pointy stick for no good reason
• watching animals fighting on youtube hours of fun

So I work my manshit by training mma/thai boxing, combat sambo and lifting kettlebells and weights and for my mental I write this blog watch a fuck load of docs listen to podcasts like the joe rogan experience  and I love  a good movie and TV show mainly stuff like 24, the soprano's ,dexter I do watch True Blood which brings the levels crashing down cos it's gay as fuck but I watch the wire which brings them back up I think.

I also am looking into new things to try out like my buddy came to my house the other day and he loves that Bear Grylls stuff and asked if I wanted to go out and do some bush craft stuff "yeah fuck it" So we went into the woods with bacon beans a water can and 3 knifes. He already had a camp he was working on there with a half build shelter and fire pit. My pal showed me how to make a fire the right way and then I chopped a tree down with a big knife for no reason just cause, It was fucking great I felt like I kid again running about the woods with knifes making fires and getting dirty we made the bacon and beans boiled green tea (samurai's drank green tea fuck you) it was awesome. The best bit was leaving the woods we jumped down this 4 foot ledge onto a path still holds big knifes in front of some guy just passing through he didn't know what to do his pace of walking slowed right down and me and my buddy were just laughing like madmen. It was fun

manshit 101 cut a tree with a big knife

me man me make fire

I don't Know my point here but just go and do shit workout instead of doing nothing watch a good cult movie or a doc instead of some dumb reality show fashion a pointy stick THROW ROCKS AT STUFF!!!!!! OK I HAVE LOST MY WAY HERE....

Peace Out

The Shogun

Animals Having SEX!!! IS FUNNY It Just Is

 If you have an ultra childish brain like me, then you will rank animals fucking in your top 5 funniest things on earth another is 1 year old children saying things like CUNT OR FUCK also cracks me up I don't have time to tell you the other three in my top 5 maybe another time. Put it this way your walking down the street and you notice a line of traffic being held up by a  Rottweiler blasting the ass off a Labrador Retriever with its pink cock sliding in and out cars beeping there horns. You just point and laugh and go about your day.

Which brings me the the awesome day I had with my family (girlfriend and 2 daughters) at Edinburgh zoo a few years back. It was a nice sunny day unusual for Scotland I know, So we're checking out the animals having a good time when we got to the turtles. Inside the pen filled with sand was you guessed it two turtles having sex straight  away am laughing my ass off at the turtles slow methodical thrusts a bit like myself huh ladies!! After that we watched a free monkey mma fight it was great they were beating the shit out each other could this day get any better. Moving on to were the Chimps  this male chimp was behind a glass jail with stuff for them to climb on it does get me down seeing animals in zoos but is the only way next to going and living in the wild you can get close to these animals because looking at a chimp behind glass your relaxed having a nice look. A chimp not behind glass your on edge there nice animals but you know in a heartbeat there could rip your ballbag off and chew it infront you. But anyway this chimp is sitting on a ledge with its back turned there's about 15 people with kids standing watching when the chimp out of nowhere turns jumps down to the ground covered in hay runs then slides up to the glass with his legs wide open and starts jiggling its massive grapefuit's sized balls in front of everyone like he waited for the best moment to strike again a little uncomfortable but I almost shit myself laughing.

.


Moving on and to finish the day the loins great scary powerful cats I think there was one male and three females the alpha had a strong pimp hand for sure. After watching them sleeping for a few minutes my girlfriend Jane notice's a lady from own hometown I didn't know her but she was very proper spoken almost posh if you will with her mummy mummy look at the loins posh son very Harry Potter like kid, I will bet money he grows up loving a creamy saltly load in his mouth I just got that vibe, So since I didn't know the woman I kept quiet and let them talk away about ladies things shoes,cooking,periods and cleaning the house or something I wasn't listening when the Alpha loins wakes up swaggers around I bit then decides to flat out rape one of the females just gets on top pins her down by the back of the neck with his giant alpha paw and starts giving it powerful thrusts not like the turtles earlier these were POWERFUL!!!! you could his loin balls slapping off the loiness TANG!! then gives it THUNDEROUS ROARS guess thats how it works in the jungle. When this was going on the harry potter kid asks "mummy mummy what are they doing" now am doing my best to hold this laugh in now Mother said "there wrestling son just wrestling" too late now am laughing ultra loud after standing saying nothing for 10 minutes there was tears in my eyes. So to round off a nice family day we saw turtles slow thrusting a chimps big hairy testical's and a loin raping..


.its just funny to me am sorry oh oh oh we also saw a Rhino pissing on another Rhino's head AWESOME JUST AWESOME

PEACE LOVE AND MONKEY JIZZ
THE SHOGUN